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Me Committing to Me

Me Committing to Me

I’m beginning to live the life I never thought I could have.

It hasn’t even been a year and so much has changed for the better in my life.

One year ago I was extremely frustrated with where I was in life.  I was hustling and working as a Pilates instructor and a performer. The only life I had known was a hustling life where I had to work REALLY hard to make money in order to make ends meet.  Burnout was completely normal in my life. Every few years I literally fainted from burning the candle at both ends and not taking good care of myself. I was frustrated with this life and I felt so lost last year.

I so desperately wanted things to change.

It’s hard to make change happen when a certain way of living is all you know. It was a vicious circle:

  1. I was constantly attracting people with strong personalities and I couldn’t speak up and make decisions for me.
  2. I was really good at doing whatever someone else wanted me to do.
  3. I’m 100% a people pleaser.
  4. I didn’t know how to make a better income since working harder and harder didn’t seem to work.

It felt like I would have to go back to school and get a different degree because I didn’t know any Pilates instructors or performers that were living a stable life in the pricey Bay Area. The ones that had the life I wanted were the ones who had partners to help support them. The hustling life where I lived with roommates worked for me in my 20’s but at 34 I wanted more but I didn’t know how to get it.

I was really good at coming up with new ideas on how to make money but I just couldn’t focus on one since I didn’t have the free time.

I was running around catering to clients, bosses, and performing. There was no free time to focus on my own business.  What would that even entail?

I got so tired of living this hectic life that I decided, on January 1st, 2015, that I was going to commit to my new business idea.  The first step was to commit to a really expensive but really amazing business strategist, Jennifer McClanahan-Flint, creator of the Leverage to Lead Program.

Once I committed to her I realized that I was really committing to myself.

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"Once I committed to her I realized that I was really committing to myself" -- Cara Grinels working on one of her 3 clients per day. [photo credit: Elle Aime Photography]

“Once I committed to her I realized that I was really committing to myself” — Cara Grinels working on one of her 3 clients per day. [photo credit: Elle Aime Photography]

For years I knew what I wanted, I just never listened or thought I could get there. I would constantly tell people that what I really wanted was three in-home clients a day, in the morning hours, so I would have the rest of the day to do my other passions like dance, yoga, ceramics, sing. I didn’t want to spend all my time burning out by teaching 5-8 clients a day and then performing in the evening.  It’s taxing and mentally and physically draining.  There’s no way in 10 years I would be able to keep that up. With 3 clients I would have enough energy to to give what each of my clients deserved, which was my FULL attention.  I would make a 6-figure income which is more than enough for me to live the life I want. I would be able to meditate, get 8 hours of sleep, have time to eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Those things are so simple but I never had time for them. The life I want also includes living alone in a house I buy with the money my business earned. I would be able to save enough to travel and do all my extracurricular activities. If I decide to have kids I could pay for things that my parents provided, things like braces and dance lessons.

Once I committed to myself there was a new confidence that emerged.

The strong personalities no longer had power over me. It wasn’t easy changing those relationships but with time and constantly asking myself WHAT DO I WANT?, I was able to do it.  (I still have to work on this)

My life isn’t perfect, but it definiltey has upgraded in less than a year. I’m SO excited for what’s possible. A successful business has everything to do with mindset.  It feels SO good to put my energy into something I created, especially since it’s working. One year ago I felt so small and now I feel if I set my mind to it I can make it happen.  In order to set my mind to something I have to take the time to take care of ME.

  • Possible: want
  • Impossible: stop
  • Repossible: commit

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Are you living the life you never thought you could have? If not, why not? Maybe I can help. Let me know in the comments.

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