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You can push all you want, but if you don’t allow, you’ll get nowhere.

There is something to be said for grinding it out, determination, strength, perseverance, and patience. It’s all so powerful. It can break down barriers, fell trees, topple mountains.

But here’s the image that comes immediately to mind.

Ever watch a mafia movie? Or a real tough-guy action film? They kill at random, break people’s necks with a single snap of their wrists, and are seemingly unstoppable.

But who then puts a stop to it? Someone so seemingly small and weak. Someone with the strength of an injured gazelle but is staring down the ferocious lion. How can it be? How can something so small stop something so large in its tracks? Who can stop the mafia boss or the evil hitman?


Or Aunt Zelda. Or little nephew Johnny. Or maybe his 94-year old father, from his deathbed.

See how that works?

Mr. Strongman can break through walls, shoot his way through armies, and drive his way through a city covered in relentless police pursuit. But Aunt Zelda says one thing and Mr. Strong becomes Mr. Marshmellow.

What is that power that she holds over him?

It’s not strength. It’s not muscle. It’s not brawn or brain or brute.

It’s allowance.

Now, forget the mafia dude and come back to your world. It might not even be your mom or dad or aunt or little niece with the pigtails. It might be someone even scarier. It might be you.

It's thin, but you need to allow yourself to break through.

It’s thin, but you need to allow yourself to break through.

The vision I had was that I was underwater and there was a thin layer of ice above me. In order to get out (and breathe and survive and live and thrive), I needed to break that ice.

It wasn’t thick. It wasn’t strong. I could see through it. It wasn’t a question of strength or power or even know how. It was a question of permission. Of allowance.

Was I allowing myself to break through? Was I done suffocating under water with too little oxygen and was I ready to reach through and pull myself up and out? Was it time? Was it time to allow me to go there?


It’s OK. I’m allowed. I give myself permission. It’s time. Now is time. Finally, now is time. Not too early, not too late. But it’s now. I need to get up and through as it will freeze over again. It’s OK, I’m through. I’m up. I’m out. I allow.

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